ADHD Is a Serious Disorder. Here’s what it feels like to me…

I have ADHD and despite what many people think, it's a very serious disorder. 

For many ADHDers it's difficult to describe what they're going through to people who don't have it. Often, even the people who love us most have no idea how challenging it is and in an effort to help us, actually hurt us.

One of the ways ADHD is challenging is the inability to initiate and follow through with tasks that you both need and want to do. 

To observers this may look like a simple lack of motivation or laziness but it's a literal inability that requires unique solutions (ahem…not neurotypical solutions).

Here's an entry from my personal journal that describes what ADHD feels like to me and what it's felt like to find hope again after years of defeat.

"It’s a unique form of torture to have the intellect, creativity, and know-how to accomplish things and help yourself but be prevented from doing so by your own brain and body.

It’s like a carrot constantly being dangled in front of you and knowing that all you have to do is reach out and grab it but your arms won’t move, they’re stuck at your sides. You try as hard as possible to move them but they won’t budge.

And all society sees is that you’re an intelligent person so you must be choosing not to move your arms. Society and even the people who love you most, keep saying, “Come on, all you have to do is move your arms like me. It’s easy, I’ll show you. Simply move your arms front to back, then up and down, and now in clockwise circles. You can do it, you just have to keep trying.”

And so you do. Day after day, year after year you keep trying over and over to move your arms like they do and it still doesn’t work. Over time you start to believe at a very deep level that there’s something wrong with you and that you’ll never be able to move your arms.

So, you live in chronic overwhelm, trying to keep your head above water, and give up on ever do anything with your arms or ever tasting the carrot.

Until one day, someone looks at you curiously and says, “Hey, why are you trying to move your arms like that? Your arms are different. They’re like mine. They DON’T move front to back, up and down, or clockwise. They work back to front, down and up, and counterclockwise.”

You try to move your arms they way they describe and, through they feel sluggish and heavy, they start to work. You reply in awe, “I didn’t even know those were options, no one’s ever taught me about other ways to move my arms.” You begin to cry in both relief that your arms work and sadness that you’ve spent all this time without knowing this new information.

The person says back to you, “I’m sorry you weren’t told sooner and I won’t lie to you, you’ll still have challenges because your arms aren’t used to movement and people won’t always understand why your arms aren’t doing things their way. But remember, things will get better with practice the only person that needs to understand is you. Perhaps it would be a good idea to rebel against the teachings that are harming you and do things your way.”

All of a sudden you have hope again. You see the truth in what this person has said, and though you’re not yet sure yet what you’ll do with your arms or what your next step is, you see that a steps are available.

Moving your arms is difficult for while and you still experience ups and downs, but you’re learning ways to live differently and finding the courage to do it in spite of what others think and do. And it’s often even fascinating and exciting.”

That’s what it’s like having ADHD (and other things that come along with it), having your arms stuck at your side when the use of your arms is what you need most."

Feelings of defeat and overwhelm are still frequent visitors in my life but their stay with me is short be because I've learned how to manage my mind and do things my way, and when I see the progress and results that has given me, hope and confidence are near by.

Dear friend, when I listen to my clients, family members, friends, and even strangers who have ADHD, my heart aches with empathy but also longs to share what I've learned. I sincerely want to offer hope and lasting change to as many people as possible.

Having a life coach is what first guided me to a place of hope. It gave me the awareness and confidence to do things my way instead of what I thought was the “right” way. 

I'd like to do my part in helping you with that. And after years of coaching, hundreds of happy clients, and a life time with ADHD, I’ve learned what’s effective and what isn’t. I’ve learned how to help people move their arms freely and reclaim their lives.

If you’re a woman with ADHD who’s ready to finally get unstuck and overcome overwhelm and gain more peace, consistency, confidence, and fulfillment, book your free consult call and learn more about what a consult call is by clicking HERE. We’ll chat, have fun, do some coaching, and answer all of your questions. It’s seriously low pressure.

This is where hope begins and progress unfolds.

If at the time you read this blog post, any links aren’t current or you have any questions, please send an email to jody@jodylong.com and you will receive help.

So much love to you!

Jody